The Carlbrook thread

[Charly]

Groups--   I think twice a week.  Maybe 3 times.  The groups were coed and I seem to recall that you could "call" someone to be in your group.  So-if you wanted to confront someone or yell at them, you requested a group with them.  This was awhile ago, but I think that's how it worked. Then the kid who was "invited" got to sit there and get shit.
There were some good staff who led better groups than others.  My son particularly objected to one senior staff- he hated me and my son and took it out on my son.

[Dr Phil]

If three people were sitting around with my mom trying to piece together an experience I had based on the bits and pieces that I chose to tell her.. .it would be amusing indeed. This is a carlbrook thread, with no kids posting here that ever went to carlbrook. Its like trying to discuss programs with the who. Since nobody has experienced it, everything is possible.. everything up for grabs. I remember a few years ago when I first found this forum wwasps didnt have its own forum or anything like that and I just read. because it was mostly theoretical talk from program parents.. not a whole lot of kids posting on the net about their experience... then or now. as the stories started to build that theoretical talk disappeared because there were finally some facts to work with. my point is that this argument can go in a million ways, but it doesnt change the facts and nthe truth is none of us know them.

If you asked my parent about my program experience ..i cant tell you how wrong of a source that would be. i would hate you for doing that, because it would obscure the debate with their conjecture and brainwashing and all that good stuff.

[Anne Bonney]

You ask how carlbrook could be bad for a kid? What if they embrace those social norms and when they get home they apply it to their friends and family? Because they will, it will be ingrained in them until they take the time to deprogram themsleves of that bull crap. You might notice a program vs program undertone to a lot of duscussion here thats because they divide the kids. Some buy into it and embrace it, others fight it and see it for what it is like your son. But it seems to me you agree your son was correct in misbehaving in these ways? Am I correct in that, or would you prefered he learned the ethics of ratting out friends to benefit yourself, etc? Most parents see these aspects of program as a good thing, and pay good money for it. They arent on the phone all day long criticizing the program, they are doing the opposite. Then theres ones like Sue Scheff who take it to a whole new level and build a little empire based on their experience as a program parent and fall in love with the whole scheme..

[Charly]

I only feel qualified to talk about some of this because Psy and I were talking over Christmas when my son was right next to me so I could actually ask him.  He is far enough removed from it that I think I got pretty accurate answers.  He's not the most verbal person on the subject, though.

[psy]

Groups--   I think twice a week.  Maybe 3 times.  The groups were coed and I seem to recall that you could "call" someone to be in your group.

ask your kid for details on that.  It sounds like a firing squad.

So-if you wanted to confront someone or yell at them, you requested a group with them.

i should really read the whole post before responding. :lol:

This was awhile ago, but I think that's how it worked. Then the kid who was "invited" got to sit there and get shit.
There were some good staff who led better groups than others.  My son particularly objected to one senior staff- he hated me and my son and took it out on my son.

How so?  Why didn't your son like him?

[psy]

Groups--   I think twice a week.  Maybe 3 times.  The groups were coed and I seem to recall that you could "call" someone to be in your group.  So-if you wanted to confront someone or yell at them, you requested a group with them.  This was awhile ago, but I think that's how it worked. Then the kid who was "invited" got to sit there and get shit.
There were some good staff who led better groups than others.  My son particularly objected to one senior staff- he hated me and my son and took it out on my son.

This format is different from what I knew.  We had nightly groups with the kids required to do two topics a week where they spoke their piece and got feed back from the group and counselors. The rest of the time they could call huddles to discuss group issues at any time to confront or to compliment fellow group members.

Was their any set rotation of topics in group or was it all spontaneous?

Was their any limits set on what sort of behavior could be demonstrated in Group? Meaning could you yell and scream at a person to your hearts content or did the kids have some sort of guidelines?

At least at bmark.. they had a moderator.. but he/she acted more as a battlefield commander... coordinating the verbal attacks to be more on target (on the issues)...

[Charly]

The guy was incompetent.  I've discussed him before.  He was the "Dean of Academics" but he was an idiot.  I couldn't get him to anything in the way of making sure my son got to take the standardized tests he needed for the next schools, etc.  The academic issues were totally botched by him, even though the teachers themselves were pretty good.  The guy felt that I exposed his incompetence, I think.  He was strange.  He's been at other programs-  Glenn Bender.

[psy]

I only feel qualified to talk about some of this because Psy and I were talking over Christmas when my son was right next to me so I could actually ask him.  He is far enough removed from it that I think I got pretty accurate answers.  He's not the most verbal person on the subject, though.

That is undestandable.  It's a lot easier to move past.. move on.. and leave behind the bad times.. problem is for me.. I keep thinking about the people still there.  well.  maybe your son will be bothered by it some day.

[Charly]

I don't think the groups were nightly.  At night they had "last lights" after study hall etc.  At "last lights" a kid could speak about something on his or her mind.

The groups were in the afternoons after school.  I'm not sure about the topics.  I don't know if the topics were assigned or if it was a free for all. You had to move across the circle from someone you were going to address.  That way you were a "safe" distance from them.

[teachback]

Hey everyone, just wanted to tell yas I've been reading along..

Gonna go catch Letterman, ttyl.

[psy]

The guy was incompetent.  I've discussed him before.  He was the "Dean of Academics" but he was an idiot.  I couldn't get him to anything in the way of making sure my son got to take the standardized tests he needed for the next schools, etc.  The academic issues were totally botched by him, even though the teachers themselves were pretty good.  The guy felt that I exposed his incompetence, I think.  He was strange.  He's been at other programs-  Glenn Bender.

did your son say anything about what things were talked about in group?  how the staff acted?

[Charly]

I will ask him that.  I'm also not sure if the groups had guidelines and the kids were limited in what they could say.  
I, too, have to sign off.  Short night tonight.
More tomorrow.

[psy]

I don't think the groups were nightly.  At night they had "last lights" after study hall etc.  At "last lights" a kid could speak about something on his or her mind.

"last lights"  what a co-incidence.. same word at bmark.. must be common with CEDU clones.

The groups were in the afternoons after school.  I'm not sure about the topics.  I don't know if the topics were assigned or if it was a free for all. You had to move across the circle from someone you were going to address.  That way you were a "safe" distance from them.

yup.  ask yourself why that safe distance was needed?

[psy]

night

[Anne Bonney]

I only feel qualified to talk about some of this because Psy and I were talking over Christmas when my son was right next to me so I could actually ask him.  He is far enough removed from it that I think I got pretty accurate answers.  He's not the most verbal person on the subject, though.

That is undestandable.  It's a lot easier to move past.. move on.. and leave behind the bad times.. problem is for me.. I keep thinking about the people still there.  well.  maybe your son will be bothered by it some day.

That's what keeps me coming back here every time I swear I'm leaving.    Ginger commented a long time ago when we were doing this with some Straight decendant....Growing Together I think.  It was a Friday night and she stopped me in my tracks with that comment about kids being in Open Meeting right at that moment.  Still gives me the willies to think about.